People often look at our family and our relationship and think that we have everything sorted, that we are such a "lovely" family. (Not sure if the number of children that we have is the reason for them drawing that type of conclusion). However it hasn't been always the way we have perceived it. We have had huge arguments and I have packed my bags more than once (I know its awful isn't it?!) as we have had some real marital issues which have often felt insurmountable.
Dear friends of mine at Connections recently shared on removing the quit option. The absolute conviction to never give up no matter what happens. I know that I said my vows and they meant a lot to me then, but I was also repeating words that we were expected to repeat and its so easy to make promises to your spouse-to-be when things are still rosy and you haven't had to deal with any issues yet.
Of course when the paw paw hits the fan, those promises can so easily be forgotten and after all in a society of fast food, instant gratification and media - divorce seems like a real quick and easy option when things get a little difficult.
But when you remove the quit option you are vowing to stand firm ,to never give up, to keep hoping, keep loving and keep holding on (even if its through gritted teeth).
And so I decided that it was time ..... time to get ride of that alternative forever. I promised Sean that I had removed the quit option from our marriage and that no matter what I would never give up. What a frightfully sweet moment that was. Even as I made this promise to him, all my insides went crazy and I thought "but what if".... but I knew it was the right thing to do. He responded by making a promise never to quit on us, to never quit on me.
And interesting enough we have noticed a new tenderness in our relationship, a new commitment and consideration. Its definitely changed something in us and I know that God honours a commitment like this. We are not naive to think that life will now be perfect and our marriage will never falter but there is a new level of depth to our relationship as we make that purposeful decision to allow God to strengthen us as a three stranded cord.
I love this man who has been brave enough to risk it with me...... forever.