Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Faulty foundations in Marriage and Parenting

I could say it's all your fault, or my mother's fault, or my twin-sister-which-I-don't-have-who-lives-in-Russia's fault- but then I would be denying responsibility for my own actions and reactions.
We all have faulty foundations which result in faulty towers- even if we were brought up in a Christian home, these faulty foundations can be in any part of our thinking or make up.  It could be in our approach to parenting, discipline, communication, friendship or conflict resolution.  The problem is that unless we sort out our foundations we will continue to pass on this same weakness in character to our children.

All you have to do is have my kids over at your house for a couple of hours and you will quickly hear and see my weaknesses.  (or Sean's but like he said to me one day - I spend 80% of the day with them so they are more likely to be showing my weaknesses rather than his - OUCH!)

I could try really hard and lay blame (which would be my natural inclination because it would be convenient) but actually, more importantly I need to remove those faulty foundations and replace them with good solid biblical ones.  This can be a rather painful process and some take longer to remove as they can be entrenched and difficult to get out.  But with doing this, I am able to be the mother, wife, friend and daughter God intended me to be.  And I can leave a wealthy deposit in my children's lives.

What do your foundations look like?  Are you tired and frustrated by some of your foundations - the ones you know need to change - the ones that keep tripping you up?  The ones that cause hurt, disappointment, broken relationships - I know I am! And I can stay in this space and keep on doing the same thing, the same way with the same result


" Lord in your mercy and grace will you change me.  Show me Lord where there is faulty thoughts, behaviour and emotions and help me to submit to your hand of change"

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